"Story 1"

by Cassi Jerkins

The date couldn’t have gone more swimmingly for Jim and Jill. Jill looked delightfully divine in her pastel blue summer dress. Though Jim seemed a bit under dressed his curiously contagious green eyes kept Jill from caring. They spent two whole hours in the Green Basil Teatime Cafe without a notice for time. The mention of a certain popular English band gave the anxious chase a push into a more porous and fruitful exploration, giving the two butterflies. “Could this be the one?” they both thought in revealing secrecy. 

They were suggestively kicked out of the cafe when the barista began to sweep the scone crumbs out from under their feet; they both did not want this night to end just yet. Jim, however, had a place to take Jill she would surely love for it was a place that Jim held close and longed to share with a bright eyed girl. Jill was this girl, the one perhaps he had pondered about when he dared to gaze into the future.

Jim took Jill’s arm in a noble way and lead her toward the lake. Jill knew the lake well but dared not to ruin Jim’s surprise. They both struggled at first for something to say during their walk but together realized the sounds of the silent cool evening was rather romantic. When they reached closer to the lake, Jim chose to take Jill under the willow trees away from the concrete path. She laughed as the willow branches swiftly brushed upon them. Jim wished her laugh would sing on forever. Through the willow trees they crossed when the lake finally announced itself. Both stopped in amazement at the sight of the lake. Never before had it looked so beautiful. Unknowingly they grasped each other’s hand. “How perfect to be sharing this moment with you” the gentle squeeze seemed to whisper. Years to centuries would have flown by if the two could permit and there they would have stayed.

Jill noticed Jim was growing rather anxious. She took the lead and led him to her favorite spot under an oak tree near the lake. Together they sat and looked over the lake, the draw of the moonshine upon the lake pulling them towards its beauty. Jim glanced at Jill as beads of sweat dripped down his face. She glanced over at him and saw his puppy-like quiver.

“Oh Jim!” she said, “Don’t look so frightened. I really can’t contain myself much longer! The truth is I find you absolutely divine! This evening has made me realize the perfection that exists in the universe. I feel as if every other moment of my life was just a bland lie. This... this is Truth! This is Love! Why Jim, I think I believe in soul mates!”

Jill clasped her hand against her mouth. “Oh, I’ve said too much. I’m sorry, I guess I was just too excited.” Jill looked away embarrassingly and then back at Jim in hopes of affirmation. Jim looked around nervously and then forced himself to gulp. “No Jill, it’s not that. No. ... Truth be told I too want to be with you more than anything. I truly hope you’re the one-”

“Oh Jim! Do you really think so? Oh Jim!” Jill squealed. She leaped forcefully towards him with her arms wide spread when she heard a slight, peculiar sound. They halted and stared into each others eyes. A bead of sweat quickly slid down Jim’s face, passing by his tremor-ing lip. Another abrupt sound release from Jim’s anus leaving behind a most moist and heinous smell. Jim quickly got up and ran to a bush to take an enormous shit. Jill looked away once again as Jim’s boisterous sounds filled the evening night. She tried to hold back her tears as she realized for the first time: this is the best she’ll ever do.